The Lost child within me!!!

My below post is about something which we all are facing today in this competitive world but knowingly or unknowingly we are not ready to accept.

I realized that in this daily race of life, I have become tired and exhausted of living a dual life. One face of my life is for the external world where I have to look firm, composed and aggressive towards my ambitions. But there is one more side to it, I realized I have one more version of myself.

The other version is afraid, sad, childish and submissive. He doesn’t want to achieve more and be contesting forever. Rather he wants to achieve less and die in peace. He never wanted to grow old because he knew that in the competition of life, his ambitions will beat his soul by a fair distance

I wrote the below lines (please forgive if this is a bit crude because I was just in flow of writing my emotions) and posted here to see if there are people like me who have forced their inner Niraj to a corner from where he can’t come out.

What was better, childhood full of purity and energy or the current life where in the quest of achieving never ending desires, I am completely exhausted


“Apne Khoye hue bachpan ko dhoond raha hu main,

Zindagi ki daud me khud ki jagah dhoond raha hu main

Mere dil ne Sapne dekhe the bachpan ki raato me

Un khoye hue sapno ko aaj dhoond raha hu main

Kabhi main Shayar tha, toh kabhi tha main khiladi,

Kabhi main neta tha, toh tha kabhi pagal anadi,

Befikr thi zindagi meri, bus dil me ek pagalpan tha

Apne is pagal dil ki muskan dhoond raha hu main

Kabhi muskura ke na jee Saka, us zindagi ko dhoond raha hu main,

Aapne aasuon ke gehraiyo me, bachpan ki muskan dhoond raha hu main

Badi kashmakash hai is dil me aaj wajood ko le kar

Apni maa ki nam aankhon me, uske khoye bete ko dhoond raha hu main

Thak gaya hu jee kar ab, maula tujhse sajde ki wajah dhoond raha hu main

Happy writing!!! Stay Blessed!!

Much love

 

25 thoughts on “The Lost child within me!!!

  1. You write well in hindi. Nicely expressed.
    I feel, Searching is good. That too if you are searching yourself. It means you are on the right path.
    There is time for everything. I believe , everything happens at the right time.
    I wish you all the best in your quest of seeking whatever you are seeking. ‘You get what you seek!’

    Liked by 3 people

  2. ढूंढ रहे हैं हम उस मासूम बचपन को
    अगवा कर जिसे
    इस तेज़ रफ़्तार से भागती दुनिया ने
    किया कैद किसी अंधेरी कालकोठरी में

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi, found you on First Friday. Nice to meet you!

    This is something I imagine a lot of people can relate to. As you get older, most have to face situations they feel uncomfortable with and you have to put on a facade and pretend to be a person you are not. It wears you down. If you spend too long outside yourself, it is easy to forget who you really are.

    Very nicely written, I love the way you have included snippets from another language. It is wonderful to see a personal touch. Nicely voiced. Thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

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